Friday Funnies

Happy Friday!! 🙂

Enjoy the Friday Funnies.

BUT FIRST

HIGHLY DANGEROUS VIRUS:
“Weekly Overload Recreational Killer” (WORK) is currently going around. If you come in contact with this WORK virus, you should immediately go to the nearest “Biological Anxiety Relief” (BAR) centre to take antidotes known as “Work Isolating Neutralizer Extract” (WINE), “Radioactive UnWORKED Medicine”(RUM), “Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter”(BEER) or “Vaccine Official Depression Killing Antigen”(VODKA).
Please raise awareness!!

‘n Klein seuntjie speel in die sitkamer met sy treinstel. Sy Ma is in die kombuis doenig.

Sy hoor die klein seuntjie: “Toet-toooeeet, stasie nommer 56, almal wat wil af fok, fok af en almal wat wil opfok, fokop.”

Sy Ma kry amper ‘n hartaanval,… maar besluit sy los hom. So rukkie laterhoor sy hom weer: “Toet-tooeeet, stasie nommer 101, almal wat wil af donner, donner af en almal wat wil op donner, donner op.”

Sy gryp hom, slaat sy gat aan die brand en stuur hom kamer toe. Sy sê hy kan uitkom as hy jammer is. So rukkie later kom hy snikkend uit sy kamer uit en gaan speel verder.

Toet-tooeet, stasie nommer 34, almal wat wil af klim, klim af en almal wat wil op klim, klim op en die van julle wat wil weet hoekom is die fkn trein laat, vra die teef in die kombuis =))

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny.
So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about
where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honour their secret.
After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the man’s new
face. He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and
relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!
One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, “Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?”
“My darling,” she replied,
“I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss my ass.”

An adorable little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp:
“Excuthe me mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?
the shop keepers heart melts and as he points at a glass case, “Do you want a widdle white wabby or a thoft fuwwy bwack wabby?”
The little girl rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice, “ I dont fink my pyfon weally gives a phuck!” 

Want to read more funnies?click here to read more…

If you have a funny you would like to see here either post it as a comment or mail it to me on stuffdidoodles@gmail.com

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Posted on June 22, 2012, in Funnies and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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