My healing journey

Thinking that I can finally crack open that bottle of champagne I bought for my 40th.
Yeah, it was an entire month and a few days ago and my bottle has been sitting waiting patiently for me to celebrate.
So you know why I haven’t celebrated yet, I was on drugs…
LOL NOOOOO not thooooose kind of drugs, I was taking medication – a long list I might add, of the kind of pain medication, you are given after you have an op.

For many many years now, actually since I was 10 years old I had pain on my left wrist.
I slipped on wet slasto on Boxing Day 1986, and broke my wrist, way back then. To add insult to injury, my stepfather was the kind of man who, when he met you decided which method would be the best to kill you.
So to cut a long story short he would grab the thing that would hurt me the most when I was “naughty”… My wrist. He would usually leave it dislocated, and I learned pretty quickly how to put it back into place.
So, still after he exited my life, I suffered with pain every now and again. I’d wrap it and keep a constant flow of Arnica, pain tablets if it was very bad, and after a few days I’d be fine again.

Towards the end of 2015 the pain started up one day, and never left. My husband bought me a wrist guard and although that helped while I was wearing it, as soon as I took it off, I was back to square 1.

I decided that enough was enough. I listened to my friend and booked an appointment with her boss, an orthopaedic surgeon. I should add awesome but that would give away the story. Nah, what the hell. He’s awesome.

This entire experience was a spiritual journey for me. The beginning of REAL healing from my past.

Dont get me wrong I was nervous as can be, and sleep became a distant memory.
Instead I would toss and turn ans worry about anaesthesia and what my kids would do while I was in hospital.
My husband works for a man who is as tactful towards family life as a barbarian caveman – ooga booga, drag she woman by hair to medicine man, tie kids to tree, they be fine, you come work. *thuds chest with fists* – you get the picture…. Now times that by infinity and add profanities and NOW after every second word.

In the new year, I went for xrays, which were a breeze, I’d experienced those before. The lead up to the MRI was frightening. I managed however to lay dead still throughout the procedure.

Then came operation day, my fairy sobbed as she said goodbye to me. It was her first day of school. I held back whatever emotions I had, bottled them up, soothed her and smiled all the way to the ward. The cleaning lady even complimented my smile.

I had to wait a while before the op and as I was waiting Rachel Plattens Fight Song came on the TV. I always could relate to the words. It just said to me you can do this. You’re scared, but you can do this.

The trip down the maze of hallways to the theatre was daunting to say the least. My glasses were back at the ward and the machines I had passed en route reminded me of some alien experimentation movie I watched a few years back.

All my fears were over in literally seconds. The next thing I remember, I was laying in recovery, cast on wrist and having my blood pressure checked on my leg.

I managed to eat lunch and my nausea stayed at bay.

I had a lovely group of day and night nurses. The matron was understandably upset because the new water bottles she purchased for the ward had disappeared, but she was still friendly.

I am so grateful to those ladies, I filled a few kidney shaped bowls with my dinner when my nausea returned and I said goodbye to it and likely my lunch… They kindly cleaned me up and cleared them away time and again.
My husband and kids brought along fresh jammies and re dressed me during the evening visiting hours so I didn’t need to spend the night in those darling gowns which show off your hind quarters so well. Also Immensely grateful for that.

I went home the next day, and my two physiotherapist minions, so my doc calls my kids, were great. So was my husband.

He played moms taxi, did the monthly groceries amongst other things…

My Boy handled the chef duties, to which he doesn’t really mind. He loves cooking but I didn’t feel that it was too fair, and felt bad.

The Fairy, helped me bathe, wash my hair and help with all the girl stuff like painting nails.

Well when I arrived home I did something stupid manoeuvring around with my cast and ended up with spasming muscles so couldn’t really pull my pants up or stand for too long…. I’ll tell you, the op was less painful!

My minions rushed when called. I am by no means used to this. I am the one who does the stuff around here. To let go and allow husband and children to take over – hand over the reigns, you know… That was FREAKING hard.

Not being able to take care of myself too well, that was a nightmare.

But I did it. I am here on the other end.
What a journey! Physical and spiritual lessons all the way… A really fast and hard crash course!

Yesterday was my last doctors visit.

It’s pretty obvious that I am grateful to my husband and kids. I’ve thanked them over and over again.

To the staff in A ward from nurses, porters to cleaning … “A” must stand for angels. So where may I ask do you hide your wings??

To my doctor. I could hug you. I nearly did yesterday, because I am so grateful that you took my constant pain away. You really have no Idea. Thank you… Thank you is not a great enough word for it…

To my mom and friends, Andrea and Jacqui, who kept in regular contact always asking about my progress, you held me together…Thank you. Distant love and care is as important as the care that reaches out and touches you. I appreciate you.

So this weekend when I toast what I now call my 40th birthday present, I toast all of you too. Thank you.

No more constant reminder of the past… I am healing… 30 years later…

And don’t worry, even if my scar doesn’t fade, I’ll remember the inner strength I never thought I had, the lessons I learned and the amazing people who helped me along the way.

Thank you!!

E1035

“Fight Song – Rachel Platten”

Like a small boat
On the ocean
Sending big waves
Into motion
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion

And all those things I didn’t say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time?

This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I’m alright song
My power’s turned on
Starting right now I’ll be strong
I’ll play my fight song
And I don’t really care if nobody else believes
‘Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me

Losing friends and I’m chasing sleep
Everybody’s worried about me
In too deep
Say I’m in too deep (in too deep)
And it’s been two years
I miss my home
But there’s a fire burning in my bones
Still believe
Yeah, I still believe

And all those things I didn’t say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time?

This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I’m alright song
My power’s turned on
Starting right now I’ll be strong
I’ll play my fight song
And I don’t really care if nobody else believes
‘Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me

A lot of fight left in me

Like a small boat
On the ocean
Sending big waves
Into motion
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion

This is my fight song (Hey!)
Take back my life song (Hey!)
Prove I’m alright song (Hey!)
My power’s turned on
Starting right now I’ll be strong (I’ll be strong)
I’ll play my fight song
And I don’t really care if nobody else believes
‘Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me

No I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me

If you would like to feature as a writer on 8ight contact me on 8ightinfinity@gmail.com links are always included to your site and social media therefore leaving all credit in tact.

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About Di

Di believes that the most important and most fulfilling “job” she has is being a mom of two. She is an animal communicator. Her greatest passion is animals and their welfare. She enjoys writing about animals and topics to help others with their spiritual growth.

Posted on March 1, 2016, in Healing and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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